Dear Rivers Cuomo,
You are more to me than just the lead singer and guitarist of the highly acclaimed 90's rock outfit Weezer. You are the composer of the soundtrack of my life; my first viewing of Buddy Holly on MTV is one of the most cherished memories from my childhood. You are an inspiration that shines out of every note of music I play and every pore in my body. You are the light of my life. But not in a gay way.
I know we've had our little tiffs. Do the words "The Red Album" ring any bells for you, Ace? How about the way you totally about-faced me and released the impersonal, robotic The Green Album after the soul-crushingly personal masterwork that is Pinkerton? But the more I think about it, the more I realize the good things that came from those conflict-ridden times in our relationship. The Red Album has "Dreamin'" and "The Greatest Man That Ever Lived" (I'm referring to the song, not you Riv!) And even the cold, unfeeling Green Album has "O Girlfriend," possibly your dopiest and heart-pullingest love song post-pinkerton. And "Hash Pipe." Can't forget that, man. Possibly the most testosterone-driven, balls to the wall rocker in the Weezer catalog.
For every ying there is a wang-, I mean yang... in your songbook. For every "Beverly Hills" there is an "Across The Sea." For every "This Is The Way" there is a "This is Such a Pity." I guess what I'm trying to say is I really admire your... let's call it "imperfect symmetry." I admire it in a strictly heterosexual sense.
Your lead guitar work is what draws me to you most though RC (anyone ever call you that before? thought so). In the guitar solos you play in songs like "Susanne" or "Pink Triangle," I feel pure unadulterated sorrow and power tugging at my very essence. It is what makes me realize that the connection we have is special. Not weird special but platonic special.
Your lead guitar work is what draws me to you most though RC (anyone ever call you that before? thought so). In the guitar solos you play in songs like "Susanne" or "Pink Triangle," I feel pure unadulterated sorrow and power tugging at my very essence. It is what makes me realize that the connection we have is special. Not weird special but platonic special.
So, I guess what I'm trying to say to you is even if you keep making songs like "Everybody Get Dangerous" or "Cold Dark World", I will always think of you as I did when you first entered my life. You'll always look like Buddy Holly to me no matter how big and bushy your mustache gets.
Take control,
Michael
3/20/09
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When we hang out, Rivers likes me to call him Race Car.
haha that's weirdly hilarious Joe.
ya dude thats cool that you love Rivers but the sexuality joke became a little tired for me. other than that, it's good cos of your off-beat clever writing.
you should join albumsix.com. it's a website for people like you and i, ones that have =w= on their mind 24/7. how do you think i found your blog? i was googling images of god, er, rivers.
-ben